I Didn’t Have a Plan — I Had a Pull

The power of starting over at any age.

You’ve felt it.

That unmistakable knowing — the one that hits before logic has a chance to argue.

A flicker of truth.

A full-body yes.

An unshakable no.

That’s not fear.

That’s not overthinking.

That’s your intuition.

And it’s time to stop silencing it.

We live in a world obsessed with the finish line.

The highlight reels. The titles.

The women who seem to do it all without breaking a sweat.

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But here’s the truth:

No one really has it all figured out.

Not the dreamers.

Not the planners.

Not even the ones who look like they do.

What most people do have — buried somewhere deep inside —is a pull.

A quiet knowing.

A flicker of something more.

And the only real question is:

Will you trust it?

For a long time, I tried to be who I thought I was supposed to be.

The stay-at-home mom.

The wife.

The woman who showed up, gave her all, and rarely asked for anything back.

I come from a

And that version of me?

She built everything I am.

She raised good boys.

She loved deeply.

She anchored our home.

She opened her heart to a daughter she didn’t give birth to — and loved her as her own.

She gave space when it was needed.

Didn’t ask too many questions.

Held things together — even when it cost her pieces of herself.

And I was so proud of her.

I love that part of me.

The woman who held it all down.

Who kept everyone fed, supported, safe.

Who made a house feel like a haven

.Who poured herself into her family with quiet devotion.

This isn’t about rejecting her

This is about evolving her.

Don’t get me wrong — I loved that version of my life.

I’m deeply grateful I had the opportunity to be home, to raise my children, to be a wife, and support my husband.

It was one of the happiest seasons of my life.

So this isn’t about regret.

It’s about what comes next.

We all go through that moment—when the house is quiet, the roles start to shift, and something inside us asks:

“Is there more?”

And for me… there was.

A soft but undeniable pull in my chest.

I didn’t want more things.

I wanted more out of life.

More creativity.

More fire.

More purpose.

More love.

More truth.

I didn’t have a plan.

What I had was a whisper —and the courage to listen to it.

It wasn’t about becoming someone else.

And it wasn’t about “coming back” to myself, either.

It was about facing what had been missing inside of me.

That hunger for more.

More expression.

More truth.

More of the life I hadn’t let myself fully live.

But just because I wanted more didn’t mean I loved anyone less.

My boys — my anchors.

And my husband — even in all we’ve been through,

you were my everything for so long.

That part of me hasn’t changed.

This isn’t about rewriting the past.

It’s about honoring it, while choosing not to abandon myself in the process.

So shout out to them — to the family that made me who I am.

For giving me the courage to become more than I thought I could be.

But something else shifted.

That pull got louder.

And watching my mom so sick —witnessing the loneliness she carried

inside, the regrets, the silence, the fear she had around speaking up…

The way she tiptoed around her own needs to keep the peace with my dad —

that scared the hell out of me.

It cracked something open in me.

That was the moment I knew:

I couldn’t keep swallowing my voice.

I couldn’t keep pushing down my own desires in the name of holding it all together.

That’s not the legacy I want to leave behind.

That pull I’d been ignoring for years?

It got loud.

And I knew:

This next chapter… it’s mine to claim.

When the pull is louder than the plan, you have a choice:

Ignore it.

Or become it.

And here’s what no one tells you:

When that moment comes — when you finally decide to bet on yourself —

that’s when the real test begins.

Because the truth is, you start to see clearly.

Who stands beside you, cheering you on, even when they don’t fully understand the vision.

Who shows up when the dream is still tender and uncertain.

Who’s still there the day it comes true.

And for me?

That day wasn’t the celebration I had envisioned.

It wasn’t the champagne-popping, proud, joyful moment I thought it would be.

The one where everyone shows up, claps the loudest, tells you you did it.

It felt quieter.

Heavier.

Lonelier than I imagined.

But something still shifted.

It wasn’t just clarity — it was energetic.

A quiet separation between the people who fueled my light, and the ones who dimmed it.

And if I’m honest?

I could feel it long before I admitted it.

But I made excuses.

I filled the silence with distractions — anything to avoid feeling the truth of my own intuition.

Standing alone felt too heavy at first.

But I did it.

And it wasn’t easy.

I had no idea what I was doing.

I was terrified I would fail.

But I kept going — one step, one truth, one breath at a time.

And here I am… five years later.

Still standing.

Still writing.

Still following the pull.

Writing from my heart. From my soul.

And if you’re reading this —

Thank you for being here.

The Invitation✨

What if your next bold move

Isn’t about pushing harder —

But surrendering to what’s been calling you all along?

That’s not weakness.

That’s coming home.

⚡

~ Regina <3